Let’s Face It: Meet Julia DiCola

April 29, 2025 | At 68 years old, Julia DiCola is living proof that it’s never too late to become who you truly are. A proud transgender woman, community advocate, and founder of OurTransLife, Julia began her transition at 57, an age when many people are looking toward retirement, not reinvention. But for Julia, embracing her authentic identity wasn’t just a personal milestone, it was a moral calling. 

“I knew this was a gift,” she reflects. “And with that gift came an obligation to give back, to serve, to make meaning of the life I had fought to live.” 

Julia’s path to authenticity was joyful and devastating all at once. Finally free to live as herself, she also experienced profound loss, particularly the rejection of close friends and family members. “It was euphoric to live honestly,” she says, “but the very thing that was setting me free was hurting the people I loved. That nearly broke me.”  

Julia entered a depression and began to self-harm. She eventually attempted to leave this world. “I didn’t have the coping skills at the time,” she recalls. “I had crossed the Rubicon, and no one was coming with me.” Even during the hardest moments, Julia held empathy for those who couldn’t follow her as she embraced her authentic self. “I knew, even then, that hearing from anyone, especially a parent, is transitioning can be earth-shattering.” 

What saved her was learning coping skills, finding mental health support, and being embraced by remarkable women who entered her life, most notably her sister, whose love became a turning point that changed everything. “She was braver than me. At first, she didn’t support Julia, but after seeing my mental health struggles, she made it her mission to understand. She sought therapy, educated herself, and came to see me not as someone new, but someone evolving. I’ll never forget that love.” 

“Transitioning didn’t erase who I was. I’m still a brother. I’m still a father. Parts of you don’t disappear when you transition, especially later in life. The past and present don’t always align neatly, but both are real. You can recognize who you were, even if you no longer identify with that version of yourself.” 

Her sister’s support helped Julia rebuild her mental health and move forward. She immersed herself in community and eventually founded OurTransLife to serve the Transgender, Non-Binary, and Gender-Nonconforming communities of the Greater Bridgeport Region. “I realized healing doesn’t happen in a vacuum,” Julia says. “When you redirect your energy outward, to service, to purpose, that in itself is therapy.”  

Despite the improvement in her mental health and the community she found, to Julia, the loss of family and friends feels like “phantom pain,” a wound stemming from a lost part of herself, and one that surfaces without warning, even to this day. Julia urges others not to bury that pain, but to acknowledge it. “If you need to cry, cry. That’s not weakness, that’s how we survive.” 

While Julia didn’t initially feel affected by stigma, especially coming from a place of white male privilege, her perspective changed. “I didn’t grow up facing stigma as a trans person. I came into Julia with the bravado of white male privilege and was indifferent to it. But now I see it. Our community is traumatized by stigma, and that trauma is real and getting louder.” 

Mental health, Julia believes, is at the core of every injustice. “Whether someone’s unhoused, undocumented, or food insecure, mental stress is always part of the equation. But too often, we treat the surface need and ignore the emotional wound underneath. That’s a mistake.” 

Through OurTransLife, Julia works to change that. She and her team provide affirmation, mentorship, and safe spaces for LGBTQ+ individuals, especially youth navigating gender identity under crushing societal pressures. “You can’t separate what we do from mental health,” she says. “We’re offering relief from shame, a path toward joy, and someone to say, ‘You’re okay. You’re not alone.’” 

For Julia, this work is sacred. And it’s personal. 

“I’m constantly learning and evolving,” she says. “Transition never really ends. It’s not just about gender. We’re all transitioning into better versions of ourselves, if we’re lucky.” 

What grounds her is a firm belief in the good. “Hate is taught, not born,” she says. “Babies don’t know how to hate. If we want to heal this world, we need to stop retreating into silos. Our differences shouldn’t be our determining markers. Invite people in. Build bridges.” 

Julia shares, “If you want to help LGBTQ+ communities, take action. Every day, do something positive to push back against the rising tide of hate and discrimination. This is a moment for unity, resilience, and action. Whether it’s having a brave conversation, organizing locally, or writing to your representatives, do something. The battle isn’t just national, it’s happening in our neighborhoods, our schools, and our towns. If you have the privilege to speak freely, use it. Keep moving forward because standing still is not an option.” 

Learn more about Julia’s work and OurTransLife at OurTransLife.org. 

Let’s Face It 

Launched in 2022 by Mental Health Connecticut, Let’s Face It takes place every May in celebration of Mental Health Awareness Month. Throughout the month, we host and participate in events, share daily wellness content and vital resources, and spotlight Connecticut residents with lived experiences, amplifying their voices and journeys to inspire hope and understanding.  

Why focus on stigma? Because it’s pervasive, taking on various forms, and we firmly believe that its power diminishes when faced head-on. By sharing these compelling stories and daily wellness content, our aim is to spark more conversations, show the individuality of mental health, and increase awareness. Through Let’s Face It, we hope to help create a safer and kinder Connecticut for all. 

Let’s Face It 2025 is presented by ConnectiCare. Learn more at mhconn.org.